{"id":1019,"date":"2023-06-15T06:00:00","date_gmt":"2023-06-15T06:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/blueandread.asbarcelona.com\/?p=1019"},"modified":"2024-01-10T12:30:13","modified_gmt":"2024-01-10T12:30:13","slug":"1019","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/blueandread.asbarcelona.com\/?p=1019","title":{"rendered":"Our Colliding Orbits: Chapter 7"},"content":{"rendered":"\n
<\/div>\n\n\n\n

caleb<\/h2>\n\n\n\n
<\/div>\n\n\n\n

so i did it<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/div>\n\n\n\n

i did it.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

i did it. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

i did it.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/div>\n\n\n\n

i did it<\/p>\n\n\n\n

and i didn\u2019t regret it<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/div>\n\n\n\n

i did it<\/p>\n\n\n\n

and i want <\/p>\n\n\n\n

to do it again<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/div>\n\n\n\n

i went right up to her<\/p>\n\n\n\n

i talked to her<\/p>\n\n\n\n

i thanked her<\/p>\n\n\n\n

i almost smiled at her<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/div>\n\n\n\n

but i couldn\u2019t<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/div>\n\n\n\n

it felt unfamiliar <\/p>\n\n\n\n

but nostalgic <\/p>\n\n\n\n

at the same time<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/div>\n\n\n\n

just a couple of days ago <\/p>\n\n\n\n

happiness was a butterfly<\/p>\n\n\n\n

fluttering out of my grasp<\/p>\n\n\n\n

but in that moment<\/p>\n\n\n\n

i felt like i could reach out<\/p>\n\n\n\n

and touch it<\/p>\n\n\n\n

or watch it come down<\/p>\n\n\n\n

and land on my finger naturally<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/div>\n\n\n\n

i think i wanted to smile<\/p>\n\n\n\n

when i saw the way <\/p>\n\n\n\n

her eyes lifted in surprise<\/p>\n\n\n\n

when i spoke<\/p>\n\n\n\n

but she soon looked pleased <\/p>\n\n\n\n

at the fact that<\/p>\n\n\n\n

i managed to talk<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/div>\n\n\n\n

for the first time<\/p>\n\n\n\n

in a long time<\/p>\n\n\n\n

i felt relieved <\/p>\n\n\n\n

to go to school<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/div>\n\n\n\n

for the first time<\/p>\n\n\n\n

i didn\u2019t breathe in <\/p>\n\n\n\n

the constant aroma of misery <\/p>\n\n\n\n

when i walked into my house<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/div>\n\n\n\n

for the first time<\/p>\n\n\n\n

i just went to my room<\/p>\n\n\n\n

and didn\u2019t worry about<\/p>\n\n\n\n

what my dad would do<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/div>\n\n\n\n

as i walk to school now<\/p>\n\n\n\n

i think about her<\/p>\n\n\n\n

it\u2019s strange <\/p>\n\n\n\n

i know<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/div>\n\n\n\n

i just met this girl<\/p>\n\n\n\n

but this magnet<\/p>\n\n\n\n

that draws me to her<\/p>\n\n\n\n

is just not giving up<\/p>\n\n\n\n

it almost feels familiar\u2026<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/div>\n\n\n\n

i realize now<\/p>\n\n\n\n

that her arrival<\/p>\n\n\n\n

was the strike of truth<\/p>\n\n\n\n

i so desperately needed<\/p>\n\n\n\n

to remind myself<\/p>\n\n\n\n

that not everything in my life<\/p>\n\n\n\n

will always end up a disaster<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/div>\n\n\n\n

i enter the school<\/p>\n\n\n\n

and feel- <\/p>\n\n\n\n

dare i say-<\/p>\n\n\n\n

a strike of comfort?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

it certainly doesn\u2019t <\/p>\n\n\n\n

feel like angst<\/p>\n\n\n\n

 as usual<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/div>\n\n\n\n

it\u2019s still foreign to me <\/p>\n\n\n\n

but starting to feel <\/p>\n\n\n\n

like less of a shock<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/div>\n\n\n\n

my eyes scan for the girl<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/div>\n\n\n\n

wait<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/div>\n\n\n\n

 i know her name now<\/p>\n\n\n\n

my eyes scan for olivia<\/p>\n\n\n\n

landing on her right away<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/div>\n\n\n\n

she\u2019s talking with another guy<\/p>\n\n\n\n

i feel just a flicker of something<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/div>\n\n\n\n

i don\u2019t know what it is<\/p>\n\n\n\n

all i know<\/p>\n\n\n\n

is i want to be the one<\/p>\n\n\n\n

next to her<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/div>\n\n\n\n

this is so strange<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

i haven\u2019t felt this way<\/p>\n\n\n\n

in years<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/div>\n\n\n\n

something holds me back<\/p>\n\n\n\n

from approaching her<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/div>\n\n\n\n

what if she judges me?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

no.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

it won\u2019t matter<\/p>\n\n\n\n

she likes me<\/p>\n\n\n\n

otherwise she wouldn’t have helped\u2026<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/div>\n\n\n\n

what if she\u2019s pretending?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

it can\u2019t be this easy<\/p>\n\n\n\n

she must be playing me<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/div>\n\n\n\n

why else would she talk to me\u2026<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/div>\n\n\n\n

yet for some reason<\/p>\n\n\n\n

i\u2019m filled with doubt<\/p>\n\n\n\n

that she\u2019s going to end up<\/p>\n\n\n\n

being someone who hurts me<\/p>\n\n\n\n

for some reason<\/p>\n\n\n\n

i don\u2019t have that lack of trust<\/p>\n\n\n\n

toward her<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/div>\n\n\n\n

why?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

who knows<\/p>\n\n\n\n

the strange feeling of trust is new<\/p>\n\n\n\n

yet still reassuring<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/div>\n\n\n\n

i decide to take the risk<\/p>\n\n\n\n

and walk toward her<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/div>\n\n\n\n

\u201chey\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

i say when i approach her<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201chi\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

she says<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201ccaleb, this is neo\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/div>\n\n\n\n

kind of ironic<\/p>\n\n\n\n

her introducing me to someone<\/p>\n\n\n\n

that i\u2019ve known for years<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/div>\n\n\n\n

\u201chi\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

i nod at him<\/p>\n\n\n\n

unafraid of his opinion<\/p>\n\n\n\n

his impression of me<\/p>\n\n\n\n

he smiles; that\u2019s new<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201chey, caleb\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

his voice is warm<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/div>\n\n\n\n

i\u2019ve seen him before<\/p>\n\n\n\n

they hurt him too<\/p>\n\n\n\n

i won\u2019t let them hurt me again<\/p>\n\n\n\n

i won\u2019t let their taunting <\/p>\n\n\n\n

have even a slight impact on me <\/p>\n\n\n\n

i promise myself<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/div>\n\n\n\n

i remember <\/p>\n\n\n\n

he ran out of school one day<\/p>\n\n\n\n

i guess he couldn\u2019t take it anymore<\/p>\n\n\n\n

i\u2019m hit with a pang of empathy<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/div>\n\n\n\n

someone calls his name<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/div>\n\n\n\n

he says goodbye<\/p>\n\n\n\n

leaving me with a newfound idea <\/p>\n\n\n\n

that if i actually talked to people<\/p>\n\n\n\n

they wouldn\u2019t be so judgemental<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/div>\n\n\n\n

i look at olivia<\/p>\n\n\n\n

taking her in<\/p>\n\n\n\n

she\u2019s wearing <\/p>\n\n\n\n

washed out jeans <\/p>\n\n\n\n

and a sleeveless top<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/div>\n\n\n\n

i notice something <\/p>\n\n\n\n

on her shoulder <\/p>\n\n\n\n

i blink and rub my eyes<\/p>\n\n\n\n

to make sure <\/p>\n\n\n\n

i\u2019m not imagining it<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/div>\n\n\n\n

she notices me staring<\/p>\n\n\n\n

my eyes wide<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cwhat?\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

she asks<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cno, no, nothing\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

i quickly respond<\/p>\n\n\n\n

aware that i look hesitant<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/div>\n\n\n\n

to myself <\/p>\n\n\n\n

i whisper<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cit has to be a coincidence\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/div>\n\n\n\n

i\u2019ve never seen anyone else <\/p>\n\n\n\n

with a butterfly-shaped birthmark besides\u2026<\/p>\n\n\n\n

but it can\u2019t be<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/div>\n\n\n\n

on the other hand<\/p>\n\n\n\n

when i saw it<\/p>\n\n\n\n

nostalgia ran through my mind<\/p>\n\n\n\n

like a movie<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/div>\n\n\n\n

i was flooded with memories<\/p>\n\n\n\n

of laughter and loss<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/div>\n\n\n\n

shouldn\u2019t that be a sign…<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/div>\n\n\n\n

i shake the thought<\/p>\n\n\n\n

but something tugs at my memory<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/div>\n\n\n\n

i have to at least check<\/p>\n\n\n\n

my heart pounds<\/p>\n\n\n\n

as i examine her<\/p>\n\n\n\n

looking for other signs<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/div>\n\n\n\n

\u201colive?\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

i whisper<\/p>\n\n\n\n

my voice cracked<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cdo you remember me…\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/div>\n\n\n\n

her eyes crinkle<\/p>\n\n\n\n

in confusion <\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cwhat…\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

she says<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/div>\n\n\n\n

i have to try<\/p>\n\n\n\n

i do a signal<\/p>\n\n\n\n

just in case she remembers<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/div>\n\n\n\n

i still remember it<\/p>\n\n\n\n

how could i forget<\/p>\n\n\n\n

when we were younger<\/p>\n\n\n\n

we used to make up hand signals<\/p>\n\n\n\n

our special language<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/div>\n\n\n\n

her eyes widen in recognition <\/p>\n\n\n\n

she puts her hand over her mouth <\/p>\n\n\n\n

she blinks at me<\/p>\n\n\n\n

she can\u2019t speak<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/div>\n\n\n\n

eventually she responds <\/p>\n\n\n\n

with her own signal<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/div>\n\n\n\n

\u201ci- i can\u2019t believe it\u2019s you\u201d <\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

i manage to get out <\/p>\n\n\n\n

shocked <\/p>\n\n\n\n

still processing<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/div>\n\n\n\n

she\u2019s as astounded as i am<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201ci thought that after last time\u2026\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

she trails off<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/div>\n\n\n\n

that\u2019s when i know<\/p>\n\n\n\n

i know<\/p>\n\n\n\n

she will stay by my side<\/p>\n\n\n\n

for as long as she can<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/div>\n\n\n\n

i know <\/p>\n\n\n\n

that i can\u2019t lose her<\/p>\n\n\n\n

for a second time<\/p>\n\n\n\n

won\u2019t let myself lose her again<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/div>\n\n\n\n

i knew<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

there was something <\/p>\n\n\n\n

about this girl<\/p>\n\n\n\n

that caused me to know <\/p>\n\n\n\n

that i had to hold on to her<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/div>\n\n\n\n

our orbits collided <\/p>\n\n\n\n

after years apart<\/p>\n\n\n\n

we met again<\/p>\n\n\n\n

and i fell apart<\/p>\n\n\n\n

with her force<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/div>\n\n\n\n

but my broken pieces<\/p>\n\n\n\n

and her spirit<\/p>\n\n\n\n

connect like puzzle pieces<\/p>\n\n\n\n

to create a perfect picture<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/div>\n\n\n\n

somehow <\/p>\n\n\n\n

we found a way<\/p>\n\n\n\n

toward each other again<\/p>\n\n\n\n

and although i am still broken<\/p>\n\n\n\n

i have never felt so healed<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/div>\n\n\n\n

the end.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/div>\n\n\n\n
<\/div>\n\n\n\n
<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

caleb so i did it i did it. i did it.  i did it. i did it and i didn\u2019t regret it i…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":36,"featured_media":1025,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1019","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/blueandread.asbarcelona.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1019","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/blueandread.asbarcelona.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/blueandread.asbarcelona.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blueandread.asbarcelona.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/36"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blueandread.asbarcelona.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1019"}],"version-history":[{"count":6,"href":"https:\/\/blueandread.asbarcelona.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1019\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1026,"href":"https:\/\/blueandread.asbarcelona.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1019\/revisions\/1026"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blueandread.asbarcelona.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/1025"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/blueandread.asbarcelona.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1019"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blueandread.asbarcelona.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1019"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blueandread.asbarcelona.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1019"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}